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Funny Job Detail

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Dear Candidate,

We are pleased to invite you for Software Engineerposition with us. Please read the mail clearly for understanding about the job. We would like to bring to your notice that due to global recession we have made changes in our policies to protect the Organization from downfall. Because of low demand our management had decided that each employee should contribute towards marketing efforts as a primary duty.

Designation: Software Engineer
Qualifications: BE/B.Tech, MCA or Equivalent
Experience: Fresher or up to 1 year experience in PHP, .Net, IT Marketing or Web Designing
Location: Delhi
Joining: within 30 days
No. of openings: 11

Role and Responsibilities:
You have to play both of the roles mentioned below. It will involve 75% Software development and 25% Business development.
As Software Engineer: You will be responsible for design, development and maintenance of software.
As Business Development Engineer: You will also be responsible for nominal sales of software products and services.

Technologies:
We have Microsoft .Net and Php/MySql as our core development technologies.

Targets:
(a) You have to complete projects worth Rs. 50,000 in 30 days period.
(b) You have to acquire projects worth Rs. 20,000 in 30 days period.

Salary:
(a) For the initial 3 months you will be paid Rs. 4200/- all inclusive
(b) After next 3 months you will be paid Rs. 6500/- all inclusive
(c) After next six months you will be paid Rs. 10,000/- all inclusive

Incentives:
(a) Anything above target will fetch 2% incentive on project net worth.
(b) Anything above target will fetch 3% incentive on project net worth.

Promotions:
(a) First promotion may occur after six months of joining. You may be promoted to Sr. Software Engineer with salary more than Rs. 15,000.
(b) Second promotion may be after nine months of joining. You may be promoted to Team Leader with salary more than Rs. 18,000.

Bond/Security Deposit:
You have to deposit Rs. 20,000 towards refundable security that will be paid back to you after 1 year.

How to Apply:
Simply walk in to our office for an interview with 1 hard copy of your resume. You should possess good communication skills.

Interview Timings:
Monday to Friday, 11 am to 1 pm.
22ndth January 2009 to 29th January 2009 (excluding holidays)

Contact us:
Salah Software
60, LGF, Sant Nagar, East of Kailash,
New Delhi 110 065.
Landmark: Near sant nagar post office
Phone: 011-41648668
www.salahsoftware.com



Funny “Stock Market” Story

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Once upon a time in a village, a man appeared and announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys for Rs10.

The villagers seeing that there were many monkeys around, went out to the forest and started catching them.

The man bought thousands at Rs10 and as supply started to diminish, the villagers stopped their effort. He further announced that he would now buy at Rs20. This renewed the efforts of the villagers and they started catching monkeys again.

Soon the supply diminished even further and people started going back to their farms. The offer rate increased to Rs25 and the supply of monkeys became so little that it was an effort to even see a monkey, let alone catch it!

The man now announced that he would buy monkeys at Rs50! However, since he had to go to the city on some business, his assistant would now buy on behalf of him.

In the absence of the man, the assistant told the villagers. Look at all these monkeys in the big cage that the man has collected. I will sell them to you at Rs35 and when the man returns from the city, you can sell it to him for Rs50.’

The villagers squeezed up with all their savings and bought all the monkeys.

Then they never saw the man nor his assistant, only monkeys everywhere!! !

Welcome to the ‘Stock’ Market!!!!!

Source:http://thehindimusic.com



Windows 7 is Faster than XP and Vista

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If you've been following the Windows 7 buzz, you'd know about the Beta version that leaked on the net a few days ago. You might've also thought that Microsoft leaked the Windows 7 beta on purpose to build some positive buzz.

While there's no real evidence (or likelihood) of that of any sort, the seemingly-magical build 7000 is certainly doing well for itself.

Following up on wide praise for the fledgling OS, ZDNet's Adrian Kingsley-Hughes pitted the beta up against XP and Vista in some informal "real-word" tasks like boot up, shut down, file maneuvers, installations and other common tasks. On both test systems, an AMD Phenom 9700 setup and an Intel Pentium Dual-Core E2200 number (with ATI and NVIDIA graphics, respectively), the Windows 7 install soundly bested XP and Vista task by task, with few exceptions.

Performance testing is never an exact science, but it's clear that Microsoft is taking performance very seriously this time around. We can't wait for the next conveniently-leaked beta to bolster this reputation even further.